It was a short email.
“I’m finally down to the last little bit of stuff to get out of [the place], so please let me know when and how is best for me to get a small box of your things to you.”
You would think after over a year, I would be done with putting this relationship behind me. In many ways, I have. I actually suggested that anything that I hadn’t had in a year was worth throwing away. . . only, he had a DVD of my sister in her one and only horror film role (a very amateur film, but still).
Bite the bullet, Joey.
It really wasn’t that bad. I drove to his work and pulled my car beside his and texted that I was there. A bit of an evil spirit crept in and I pondered walking in to alert him that I had arrived. I wondered what his co-workers would say when they saw me, given everything. They had always been so warm and kind, and several had reached out to me after the split. But I stayed put.
He came out, I unlocked the doors, and he transferred the box from his car to mine. We said some polite banalities, and for the brief moment our eyes met I felt . . . nothing. I watched him walk away with mild curiosity, wondering if the moment was the same for him.
I had actually seen him recently – at a restaurant near my house. I walked in with a friend, deep in conversation. It was only after I was seated for a while and happened to glance to my left that I recognized first the back of his head, and then saw her. I thought of interrupting my friend to tell him, but it wasn’t important enough. I focused on my friend, he was more important, and when we had a pause, I told him only to realize they were gone. Whether they saw me or not, I do not know.
I’ve always said that anyone going through a major break-up or divorce needs at least one year before they are truly able to put everything behind them. I was no exception to the rule. Both moments had been times I had dreaded, but they passed with very little excitement. That’s good. It’s how it should be.
I’m so thankful that this all happened several weeks ago. When a new chance at happiness came into my life, I was able to approach it unfettered with any nagging leftovers from before. It’s an amazing feeling, and I’m a very lucky girl.