I had been talking to this fellow Trotter for several days now.  The conversation was neither annoying nor fascinating, it was just general conversation via text and email.  A not unpleasant diversion.

We had agreed to meet for a date this week – and I was actually curious what it would be like to meet Trotter in person. I got the sense he was truly looking for a long-term relationship without being overly intense about it, and that was new and different.

Yesterday, I was packing up from StellarCon and in the process of carrying too many things at once, I opened up several apps on my phone with the palm of my hand (I hate when that happens!).  Annoyed, I immediately started closing out of all of them.  One happened to be POF, the dating site Trotter and I had met on. 

Within minutes, I received a new message from the site, from Trotter:

I only signed on here to respond to a message from . . . none other than my ex-girlfriend.  She has been on here checking out my profile as well as updating hers . . . OMG . . .whatever.”

It seemed weird to be getting what seemed to be a defensive explanation from a guy that I hadn’t even been on a date with yet.  Why would I care that he was on the site?  Or that his ex was checking up on him and updating her site? 

I gave back my standard answer when I don’t want to engage in the drama:


Soon after, I got this message:

OMG! Now some black chick on here wants to meet me!!!  I am not prejudice[d], but I do not date outside my race.  Just my choice and preference.”

Is it just me, or does it seem like every time someone starts with “I am not prejudiced” that they almost always are?

I answered back:

You could be missing out on a great opportunity!  Some of my best friends sleeping at my house tonight are black! 🙂

His answer:

I think I will stay like I am.  Again it’s not a prejudicial thing.  It’s just my choice.  My sister was married to a black guy and two of my three nieces are biracial, so it’s not racial at all.”

Umm.  Dude?  That proves that your sister is not prejudiced, not that you are.  And it’s not racial?  You just said you didn’t want to date outside your race.  Ergo, that would mean that it is, actually, racial.

Thanks for playing.  Here’s a lifetime supply of Turtle Wax – since you seem bound and determined to stay within your hard-headed shell.