This is what happens when you forget to log out of your OKCupid app on your phone and it’s midnight on a Friday night. <\/p>\n
He: oh boy<\/em><\/p>\n Me: oh girl?<\/em><\/p>\n He: u r trouble<\/em><\/p>\n Me: why do you say that?<\/em><\/p>\n He: because you look like trouble<\/em><\/p>\n Me: looks can be deceiving <\/em><\/p>\n He: damn! I was hoping for a bad girl<\/em><\/p>\n Me: you wouldn’t be ready for this jelly.<\/em><\/p>\n He: oh I’d eat that p****y :_<\/em>. ( Editor’s note: I have no idea what that smiley is, do you readers? also, yup, I *** the cat word.) <\/p>\n Me: I checked with the NSA, they say you are all talk. <\/em><\/p>\n He: test me NASA <\/em>. <\/p>\n Me: Unfortunately, I’m looking for a relationship, not a one night stand. <\/em><\/p>\n He: no!!<\/em><\/p>\n Me: Yup it’s true.<\/em><\/p>\n Thus ends another edition of Mastertease Theater.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" This is what happens when you forget to log out of your OKCupid app on your phone and it’s midnight on a Friday night. He: oh boy Me: oh girl? He: u r trouble Me: why do you say that? He: because you look like trouble Me: looks can be deceiving He: damn! I was…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[3],"tags":[9,11,97],"class_list":["post-369","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dating","tag-dating-2","tag-okcupid","tag-trolls"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2UnPK-5X","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/369","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=369"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/369\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=369"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=369"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/joeywrites.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=369"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}