I saw him first on Tinder – a dating app that incorporates Facebook to compare your common interests, mutual friends, and location. If you and your match select “yes” for each other, a chat message feature is unlocked. I’ve been told that some people only use it for a hook up system – others use it to find someone to date. Me, I was using it for research. Yeah, research. I swear. No really. Uh huh.

I’d had a few chat messages with folks, some I already knew, but nothing magical. One guy’s idea of flirting with me was to assure me “I’d blow ya” repeatedly. This was after informing me he was a professor at UNC-Charlotte teaching classes in public speaking and writing. Really? That’s the best shot you’ve got?

Most people answered back within a day or two of matching. Well, except for one. Every time I received a heads up that there was a new chat message, I kept hoping it would be him. But alas, no: it was the “I’d blow ya” guy with another eloquent come on.

In frustration, I clicked on his profile again to see if there was something wrong with him that I could use as salve for my bruised ego. I mean, c’mon, I’m a catch y’all. He still didn’t have any flaws, except one. He hadn’t logged in for 3 weeks.

AAUUGH! How can you not log in when I’m waiting for you to reply?? How dare you!

But wait. We have mutual friends! On Facebook! I could find him!

I asked my friends if this was creepy, and they looked at each other and said “Yes!” but I didn’t care. It was at least worth a shot.

So I stalked him off a mutual friend’s page, friend requested him and he added me back almost immediately. We started chatting and I confessed that I had stalked him from Tinder. (I mean, what if he logged in to Tinder after and then saw that I had messaged him weeks ago – now THAT would be creepy). This way all the creepy was right up front and he seemed okay with it.

Long story short? We met in person and have hit it off really well. To quote a phrase, we are smitten. Indeed, we are in “deep smit.”

I’ve broken several rules this time around, including my “not-declaring-a-potential-new-relationship- before-90- days” rule. Sometimes, rules are meant to be broken. Or at least tested for validity. For research. Yeah, research. I swear. No really. Uh huh.

*dances off happily*