In my favorite holiday movie, White Christmas, there’s a little improv between Rosemary Clooney and Bing Crosby about how what you eat before you go to sleep can affect your dreams.   If you eat one thing, you’ll dream of a blonde; another a brunette.  If you eat liverwurst?  Well, you’ll dream of liverwurst.

I had a few friends over on Thursday to watch this classic with me. But a search for the DVD made me realize that my ex-boyfriend must still have it.  A quick text confirmed it, and I had not choice but to drive over there to pick it up – or buy a new one. 

He was very cordial about it – and it gave me a chance to give him back some more of his stuff that I had found. He met me at my car – it was obvious from the car parked in his second spot that she must be there. The rain gave us an excuse to keep the conversation brief, but pleasant.

It was the 2nd of 4 ex-boyfriend moments last week.  The first came on Tuesday when I was told that he had posted on Facebook about having surgery and sent him an email to make sure he was all right.  The second was the DVD on Wednesday.  The third was Friday when I needed my network password to add my new phone to the WiFi list.  And the 4th was in the wee hours at a dance club, when 2 friends mentioned running in to him and the new girl while out to eat.

Overall?  3 out of 4 of the experiences were positive interactions.  The dinner thing was a slight twinge, even though my friend did say that the new girl was a downgrade from me.  But the important thing is that I was able to hold several friendly conversations with him and didn’t find myself getting angry, bitter, or weepy afterwards.

Dating overall has been less than exciting.  I have several conversations going with people, but nothing is making me giggle or shout with glee.  At the dance club, there were a few men who seemed interested in hooking up – although none of them appealed to me. The thought of having actual sex with someone still concerns me – playing is one thing, having breeder sex is another.  Making love is something I’ve only really done with one person -and although it had been several months since he and I had done that, it’s a First After I’m just not ready for yet. 

My roommate got his first deck of Tarot Cards.  He did a 3 card reading for me (my unspoken question was about finding someone who wanted to actually marry me and live together) and the reading said that a new love was coming very soon.  We shall see.

In the meantime, I’m thinking that I don’t need to dream of cool blondes or scatback brunettes.  A dose of realistic liverwurst is working just fine for me.